Funny Sarcastic Love Quotes
I know i'm not perfect & I know i'm not beautiful.
Deal with it! . Because I do everyday.
I tried 2 send U all my Love, but the Postman said it was just way too Big !
The Grass May Look Greener on the Other Side of The Fence. Sure it is, it's fake.
I Once thought About Giving You the Key to My Heart. Since then I Have Changed the Lock.
Love is supposed to be a Two Way Street. But yours has a one way sign on it.
If Love Don't Cost a thing, then why do U cost me so much?
All Hands were made to Hold. Then are yours Stuck Together.
Love is given, not spoken.
& a heart cannot break when it's broken.
You speak, all these words of LoVe to me.
You may as well, go tell the tree.
If you can't show so I can see.
then I don't want this LoVe to be.
If Love is Teamwork, then Who is On My Team.
You Speak of a LoVe so True. But the talk is all U do.
You look at me like the Enemy, Maybe that's what we are.
If Love is Being on Cloud 9. Then why are there no Clouds in My Sky.
If nothing is by Accident. Do I have to Create One.
I could take the Diamond Ring You Bought me. I Love it, but Not You.
Love is Something that you can't take back for a Refund, 'Cause You Decide You Don't Like it.
Love is not the Earth moving under your feet. That is an Earthquake.
If U are my destiny, then fate has dealt me a cruel blow.
If You Loved Me, Don't You think I Might Feel It.
Love is Like a Flower Opening, Only You are A Venus Flytrap.
The Miracle Of Love..They mean It's a Miracle if You can find it.
You Don't Love Me when I Need Something,You Only Seem To Love Me When You do.
Love is All the Time. Not when you have to make the time.
You are the Highlight of my Life. Almost as useful as the Ones in my Hair.
You Can't Show Me The Love I Need, Not Because You Can't, but Because You Choose Not To.
Love is Like a Toilet Bowl, The Water is the Love, The Feeling is the Flush, last but not least is the little paper covered secrets left in the bowl.
Love is Taking that dive, then getting really comfortable & peeing in the Pool.
Our LoVe is like a real live Porn, only minus all the stuff that makes Porn Cool.
Only you can take Me There. Just make Sure I Like What is There.
Love is Freedom, If you can run away fast enough.
Love is Like A Rockyroad Chocolate, tastes sweet & soft but comes out sometime later, all Bumpy & Nutty.
If True LoVe is All You need. Then where Can I buy one.
If Love is Beautiful, Then I guess thats why I'm looking past U.
You are My Sun, So that is Why I always get Burnt.
If Love Knocks You off Your Feet. I Can Stop Wondering Why I Always Get Hurt.
Don't want 4 the LoVe 4 Yourself that that U can't give 2 another.
If LoVe is Blind, then.
Why is there LoVe at First Sight?
You took word Beat out of Heart & Hurt me with it.
Selfish people think that Hugs Cost Money.
Love is like the Stock Market, Unpredictable.
If LoVe is the Air that I Breathe, then I should of suffocated by now.
If You are My Everything, then what is My Nothing.
If LoVe Hurts you, They are your Enemy, not your LoVe.
You Can't Love me much, if U are choosing 2 treat me like garbage.
A fool once believed, that LoVe is all he needed. He didn't survive past a week.
I grew up comparing myself to Barbie.
I don't have long, blonde hair.
I don't have sparkling blue eyes.
I'm not six feet tall.
& my body is far from perfect.
But I'm am better than Barbie.
'cause I'm real, 100% real, & that
is more than she could ever be.
Deal with it! . Because I do everyday.
I tried 2 send U all my Love, but the Postman said it was just way too Big !
The Grass May Look Greener on the Other Side of The Fence. Sure it is, it's fake.
I Once thought About Giving You the Key to My Heart. Since then I Have Changed the Lock.
Love is supposed to be a Two Way Street. But yours has a one way sign on it.
If Love Don't Cost a thing, then why do U cost me so much?
All Hands were made to Hold. Then are yours Stuck Together.
Love is given, not spoken.
& a heart cannot break when it's broken.
You speak, all these words of LoVe to me.
You may as well, go tell the tree.
If you can't show so I can see.
then I don't want this LoVe to be.
If Love is Teamwork, then Who is On My Team.
You Speak of a LoVe so True. But the talk is all U do.
You look at me like the Enemy, Maybe that's what we are.
If Love is Being on Cloud 9. Then why are there no Clouds in My Sky.
If nothing is by Accident. Do I have to Create One.
I could take the Diamond Ring You Bought me. I Love it, but Not You.
Love is Something that you can't take back for a Refund, 'Cause You Decide You Don't Like it.
Love is not the Earth moving under your feet. That is an Earthquake.
If U are my destiny, then fate has dealt me a cruel blow.
If You Loved Me, Don't You think I Might Feel It.
Love is Like a Flower Opening, Only You are A Venus Flytrap.
The Miracle Of Love..They mean It's a Miracle if You can find it.
You Don't Love Me when I Need Something,You Only Seem To Love Me When You do.
Love is All the Time. Not when you have to make the time.
You are the Highlight of my Life. Almost as useful as the Ones in my Hair.
You Can't Show Me The Love I Need, Not Because You Can't, but Because You Choose Not To.
Love is Like a Toilet Bowl, The Water is the Love, The Feeling is the Flush, last but not least is the little paper covered secrets left in the bowl.
Love is Taking that dive, then getting really comfortable & peeing in the Pool.
Our LoVe is like a real live Porn, only minus all the stuff that makes Porn Cool.
Only you can take Me There. Just make Sure I Like What is There.
Love is Freedom, If you can run away fast enough.
Love is Like A Rockyroad Chocolate, tastes sweet & soft but comes out sometime later, all Bumpy & Nutty.
If True LoVe is All You need. Then where Can I buy one.
If Love is Beautiful, Then I guess thats why I'm looking past U.
You are My Sun, So that is Why I always get Burnt.
If Love Knocks You off Your Feet. I Can Stop Wondering Why I Always Get Hurt.
Don't want 4 the LoVe 4 Yourself that that U can't give 2 another.
If LoVe is Blind, then.
Why is there LoVe at First Sight?
You took word Beat out of Heart & Hurt me with it.
Selfish people think that Hugs Cost Money.
Love is like the Stock Market, Unpredictable.
If LoVe is the Air that I Breathe, then I should of suffocated by now.
If You are My Everything, then what is My Nothing.
If LoVe Hurts you, They are your Enemy, not your LoVe.
You Can't Love me much, if U are choosing 2 treat me like garbage.
A fool once believed, that LoVe is all he needed. He didn't survive past a week.
I grew up comparing myself to Barbie.
I don't have long, blonde hair.
I don't have sparkling blue eyes.
I'm not six feet tall.
& my body is far from perfect.
But I'm am better than Barbie.
'cause I'm real, 100% real, & that
is more than she could ever be.
LoVe,
We think about it,
Sing about it,
Dream about it
Loose sleep,
worrying about it.
When we don't have it
we search 4 it,
When we find it,
we don't know what
2 do with it.
When we have it,
we fear loosing it.
It's a constant source
of pleasure & pain.
But we don't know
which it will be
from one moment
to the next.
It is a short word,
easy to spell,
difficult to define
& IMPOSSIBLE
to live without.
author unknown
Funny Sarcastic Love Quotes
If a guy says you're pretty then he thinks U are genuinely beautiful, if a guy says youre hot, then your wearing too much make up.
Some girls happen to be pretty, some girls happen to be smart, I just happen to be both!
If tears made you beautiful, I'd be GORGEOUS.
The longer you know a person, the more uglier or prettier they become.
The more makeup she cakes on, the more she has to cover her flaws.
Construction maintenence is always needed, to maintain perfection.
We impress with our looks, not our minds. because we know that boys are stupid, not blind.
If the definition of Beauty gets any thinner, no one will fit.
Age is a question of mind over matter, it don't matter if i don't mind.
Breast inhancements are superficial, which in turn attract the superficial. Like attracts Like.
Perfect girls arn't real just as real girls arn't perfect.
Makeup your mind, not your Face.
why don't you smile more often, it suits you.
Fashion has a personality of ugliness, so intolerable that it has to alter itself every season, to fit in.
It's not my fault that when I was a baby, I was dropped into a box of glitter and I've been shining ever since.
You can look 100 times more beautiful..if you would just smile.
Your love is doomed, if you are watching TV at your girlfriend's house, during a power failure.
My wife is a sex object. Every time I ask for sex, she objects.
Twelve years doesn't mean you're a happy couple. It just means that you're a long couple.
Love makes the time pass. Time
makes love pass.
Lovers know what they want, not
what they need.
If we men married the women they deserved. They would be very miserable.
It is impossible 2 love & to be wise.
If you cannot inspire a woman with love of you, fill her to the brim with love of herself all that runs over will be yours.
Love is an ocean of emotions surrounded entirely by expenses.
I will always love the false image I had of you.
I'd love to go out with you, but I never go out on days that end in `Y'
I'd love to go out wif U, but I'm teaching my ferret to yodel.
Love is blind, it's marriage thats the eye-opener.
Women We cannot love them all. But we must try
Misery no longer loves company. Nowadays it insists on it.
